[replica model] • LUKE FON FABRE (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fabrecation) wrote2012-07-04 03:50 pm
fabrecation) wrote2012-07-04 03:50 pm
026 [written]
[It's so bad now that Luke feels like he can barely get out of bed except for necessary needs. It's... honestly kind of strange. Sure, he's scared, and sure, he hates having to lay here and just wait for it to happen, despite writing and drawing to pass the time. But he isn't quite as terrified as he was just a month ago.
It's like he's accepted that this is happening in a quiet, somber sort of way.
There's pain every day, he's tired every day, he's thin and pale and looks as if he's just wasting away, as if he's all that's left after tiny pieces of himself slowly just... faded away. Even his hair seemed not quite as full as it ought to be.
He hated it, yes. But it's happening. And he's close to fading away completely, he knows that. Maybe that's why he's mostly okay with this. It can finally be over.
He'd only flipped through the journal to keep track of everyone. Now, though, he can't help being morbidly curious, in a way. So, making sure that he himself is out of sight, he writes slowly to the masses.]
If someone told you that you didn't have much longer to live, what would you do about it? What would you do with the last days of your life?
[It's a question that could be asked even by a curious healthy person, something to get people to think. He can think of it that way, and get answers that he might just need because of it.]
It's like he's accepted that this is happening in a quiet, somber sort of way.
There's pain every day, he's tired every day, he's thin and pale and looks as if he's just wasting away, as if he's all that's left after tiny pieces of himself slowly just... faded away. Even his hair seemed not quite as full as it ought to be.
He hated it, yes. But it's happening. And he's close to fading away completely, he knows that. Maybe that's why he's mostly okay with this. It can finally be over.
He'd only flipped through the journal to keep track of everyone. Now, though, he can't help being morbidly curious, in a way. So, making sure that he himself is out of sight, he writes slowly to the masses.]
If someone told you that you didn't have much longer to live, what would you do about it? What would you do with the last days of your life?
[It's a question that could be asked even by a curious healthy person, something to get people to think. He can think of it that way, and get answers that he might just need because of it.]
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[And after a pause:] I think that's what I'd do, too. Fight until I can't do it anymore.
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[She thinks of violent deaths, automatically, but, given thought, she could apply it to illness or any other kind of death.]
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But still. He's fought all this time... So he can understand.]
Do whatever it takes, huh? I think I like the sound of that.
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[And since he rather likes her answer:] I'm Luke. ... fon Fabre.
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I want to know it's coming. I want to be able to face it. Not have it sneak up on me.
[She knew when she was going to die. Or at least that she'd probably die. And she'd known when Thresh had hauled her up. Before she'd ever started screaming, she'd known.]
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[Luke thought he wanted to know when he was going to die. But now that he does... He hasn't felt so stressed in his life. He keeps going to sleep and wondering if he'll be waking up tomorrow, or talk to someone and wonder if it's the last time he'll see them. Sure, he'll come back here. But still...]
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[A tribute went into the arena knowing one in twenty-four would live. Knowing death was just waiting for them.
She can't be afraid of death.]
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[She almost reminds him of Tear, back when he first met her. Back when he didn't have the patience for her. She was a soldier in every way... Even when times were too hard, or hurt too much.
Still, he smiles a little.]
But thanks for talking with me about this. I just needed... [- answers] to talk, I guess.
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[Not strong enough to face death bravely. Not strong enough not to scream and plead...]
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