fabrecation | 030 [action ; voice]

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030 [action ; voice]

[It felt like dying. It felt like being caught inside a large, ringing bell and being unable to escape.

It was something he walked into willingly. And yet as it was happening, he wanted to stop, and yet he knew that he couldn't. To stop would mean the deaths of millions of others, and what's one life compared to that many?

Nothing, nothing at all. But...

Then the ringing stopped, but Luke barely noticed. Instead he was falling, falling until he fell not onto the hard floor of the tower, but the soft earth of another world. He loses consciousness before he's even aware of that.]

[Later, he can be found at the clothing shop and the item shop to pick up some things, and after a run-in with Sync and Ion, Luke had briefly visited his old apartment before he decided that he just couldn't stay. He sits heavily by the fountain, bent over with his head in his hand while the other hand holds on tight to the only item she'd left him.

He's a little hesitant to do this, and it makes him glance at his journal a couple of times, before he makes his decision. He opens up his journal, turns on the video function, and - clears his throat awkwardly first.]

This is how it works, right...? [Ah, right. He glances away and runs a hand through his (shorter, more unruly) hair before he gives the journal his attention again.] Um, hey. My name is Luke fon Fabre, and - and I was here before. I think it was just last week? It was a lot longer for me...

So... I'm back? And I'm sorry for leaving. I guess that's all I have to say...

[Except it's not, and it's just as he starts to shut the journal that he remembers.]

Oh yeah - [And he throws up a hasty filter.]

[Locked to House 1 residents (Nephry, Jade, Tear, Anise, Florian, Ion)]

Hey, uh... do you guys mind if I stay with you for a little while? It doesn't have to be for long or anything, I just - I need to find another place to stay. That's all it is.

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... I know.

[He takes in a breath, a little quicker and deeper than he meant to, lets it out slowly, then raises his head and opens his eyes again. Jade's right, after all: there's nothing that can be done. He'd grieved when she went home, he'd grieved when he visited the apartment just a few hours ago, empty and lonely and missing her warmth.

It's not that he's had enough of grieving. It's that he knows this isn't the time nor the place.]

If I knew anything about the stuff I'm not remembering...

It's simple, Luke. The missing memories may come back in time, similar to alike fonons coming together. Or they may be gone forever. I doubt there's anything of immediacy you're not remembering. Rather... things that should be moved on from.

[He adjusts his glasses, but he addresses Luke somewhat straightforwardly, with both hands resting in his pockets.]

You're the man who changed, after all, back on Auldrant. And you still are changing here - which means moving onwards.

[There'd been an underlying sadness in Luke's eyes at first, still reeling from the disappearance - and death - of the one he loved most, and frustrated from the fact that there were very clear blanks in his mind.

But after hearing that from Jade, the sadness, the frustration disappears, and instead, they light up more, and then he smiles again, mimicking Jade's pose by putting his hands in his pockets, but also raising his shoulders a little.]

Yeah... you're right. "You can't look forward if you keep looking back". I can't keep moving onward if I keep looking back at things, right?

[He lowers his shoulders, his smile fading to something softer as he looks down at the floor.]

I'm still changing. I used to think it was all about making up for what I did back in... Akzeriuth. [Even the word causes an unpleasant twist in his stomach at times.] Making up for... who I was, in a way. But it's a lot more than that.

[He can't help but smirk at Luke imitating his pose. He resists the urge to imagine Luke with a similar hair style and glasses as well, since he has that odd feeling that this isn't the time to burst into laughter.

But the words... yes, this certainly sounds like a Luke who is closer to the end. Whom had earned more of his respect.]

It is, isn't it? [Jade knows this himself, in a way. His actions go beyond just seeking to atone for what happened to the professor. So this sentiment is certainly striking him better than the more depressed Luke he'd seen when he arrived here.] What else are you seeking?

... Myself, I guess.

[He shrugs, eyes still on the floor. It's the first time he'd ever talked about this, seeing how this revelation came to him only hours ago.]

I realized something, Jade. I wanted to keep living for myself. Not for anyone else, not because of some purpose I couldn't find, not because I wanted to find some place when the Score never mentioned me. Not because I'm a replica.

I just wanted to be me. Luke fon Fabre. Not a replacement of Asch, just... Luke.

[He looks up at Jade; despite his words, he still smiles, like he finally discovered something that made him see a whole different side to life.]

I just haven't really figured out who I am yet. We've all been running around all this time...

[So. He's already taken most of the important steps. He claps a hand on Luke's shoulder momentarily, with a wry smile.]

And now all that is on hold. We're back here, where we have little choice to sit on our hands. You may have sufficient time to truly find your answer.

[And then he turns while folding his hands behind his back. It's a journey that he's faced himself - ever since Peony helped him realize that he had to change, to grow beyond his attempts replicate the Professor. To become his own man - Colonel Jade Curtiss.]

You know, I'd intended to ask you next about your last memories from home. But given what you've said just now, I can guess at the general timeframe. Certainly you've lived pass the time you were taken from before. And you've even faced the events at the Tower of Rem.

[The smile broadens when Jade clasps his shoulder; he's thinking right this time. Luke remembers how he was before he left Luceti: barely even a shell, torn between guilt and duty and what he himself wanted, leaving him thinking he had no real worth after all.

He doesn't think he's stupid for being in that state; it was just one step in his journey to be where he is now, and he knows he has many more steps. And maybe he'll fall. But he's glad that he's here.

The rest, however, makes his smile wane, and his gaze lowers to the floor again.]

I'm... there now, actually. I was just starting to...

[Is that all for him? Is that when he dies? Had he finally realized what answer he'd always wanted to find just before he died?]

[He glances towards him quietly. Could this mean - was he really plucked from the middle of a moment? Of such a life-changing moment.

He finishes the sentence quietly.]

Perform the hyper-resonance?

[The gears were already running in Jade's head. Had the fonon separation already begun? He'd want to run tests just to make sure. And make sure he can actually help Luke this time.]

... Yeah.

[His hands turn into fists again, this time raising to cross over his stomach. He remembers a discomfort there, there and in his hands, the very spots where he started to feel energy being drawn out of him. Maybe his very life.]

I remember I kept thinking... I don't want to die, I don't want to die.

But...

But you didn't.

[He adjusts his glasses as he glances over Luke.]

I take it Asch hasn't intervened yet.

[If he was taken from so early in the process... could that cause his condition to be different? But it's just guesswork so far, for Jade.]</small<

[Luke's next reaction is pretty telling, seeing how his gaze shoots up to fix Jade with a startled, concerned and - honestly, almost frightened expression.]

Wait, Asch interferes?! He isn't supposed to do that!

[So early into the process it seems. He tries to raise a hand while remaining calm in an attempt to pacify Luke's anger.]

Things didn't quite go according to plan. Regardless, he came out of that incident as healthy as ever. [You're quite a ways from his actual death, Luke!]

[Luke lets out a long sigh, his body relaxing at that.]

Oh, good... [That doesn't say anything for he himself, but - that's fine. As long as Auldrant is okay, as long as Asch is safe...]

[He feels a bit of conflict. Could there be a point to telling him that he'll survive but not for much longer.]

Yes, we all learned a lot on that day.

For example... Did you know that you're eating for two? [He says, playfully jabbing a pointer finger at Luke's midsection.]

[At first, Luke doesn't quite understand, rubbing a hand over his midsection with a frown...

And then he does, and his eyes shoot open while he launches himself back a few steps, hands raised over his face as if he were keeping away some Eldritch horror.]

What - What?! Jade, what're you - I'm not - What are you even going on about?!

[Oh, how he missed this. Jade smirks wryly.]

Luke! You should be ashamed of yourself for being so inconsiderate. Did you ever consider the feelings of the little Jewel inside of you?

The - what?

[... Why does that sound so familiar?]

What do you mean, in... Wait, is that...?

[He can't remember how, but somehow, somehow, that name reminded him of something in Luceti, something that happened. And he remembers Asch going on about it back in Auldrant, and...

Inside him?

...]

W-Well, get it out! The way you said that was just - You made it sound creepy!

Well, "creepy" does sound like a fairly accurate descriptor for the situation. But removing it isn't so easy - not when it's all mixed in with your own Seventh Fonons.

Might as well leave it where it lays. It's not doing anything to hurt you, and even if it could be removed, having it separate from your body is one step towards the rest of the village learning of its existence. And that could lead to unwanted consequences, couldn't it?

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030 [action ; voice]

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